With you...

lately i witness too much heartbreak and not enough effort,

too much giving up and not enough sticking it out,

too much throwing in the towel and not enough for better or for worse.

i just wanted to take a minute to tell my husband, 

i will put in effort.  i will stick it out.  i will be here for better or for worse.

i love you.

1. Worse, 2. Better

Maybe I'm at the age where life just got real and things get tougher.
Maybe I'm more aware of what is going on around me because I'm not as self-consumed as I was.
Maybe I'm just surrounded by marriage and babies and things that make life complicated because I'm at that stage of life myself.  Either way, I'm alarmed and saddened by the amount of people that are so willing to throw things away for "grass that is greener" or so it appears.

I'm not going to lie to you and say that everything about my life or my marriage has been rainbows and butterflies.  That's not reality.  Fact is, we face obstacles and hardships daily because they shape us and make us better human beings.  And they are worth it.

I look around me and see people giving up on marriages and love and relationships in general because they aren't meeting expectations.  Women seeking the attention they want from their husbands from their male coworkers instead.  Men flirting with female counterparts rather than their wives.  The grass is greener on the other side...in their eyes.  It makes my heart sad.

Just like grass needs the rain, our relationships need attention.  Rather than admiring what someone else has, seek to make what you have better.  Flirt.  Go on a date.  Cook a special meal.  Find a new hobby together.  Go for a walk.  Sit down at the dinner table and turn off the tv.  Try a new restaurant.  Turn off technology.  Listen.  Kiss.  Hold hands.  Dance.  Remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.

I wish more people would spend some time on their relationships before throwing in the towel.  It's not always easy, but it's always worth it.  A friend shared this quote on Facebook this week...

Maybe more marriages would last if people realized sometimes the 

better comes after the worse.

Unknown

I love you, Jus. xoxo

Soul Cleansing on the Wine Trail

My Outfit (middle): Tank: NY&Co (old), Shorts: Express via Marshall's, Shoes: TJ Maxx

Last weekend I met up with 5 girlfriends from college in Charlottesville, VA for a wine tour.  If you've never been to Charlottesville I would say it is a mixture of Charleston, SC and Burlington, VT.

There is something about a good group of girlfriends that is just soul-cleansing.  Every time I leave these girls I feel like a better version of myself.  You know what I mean?  It's like the laughter, reminiscing, and memory making is medicine for my soul.  We don't get to get together as often as we would like.  You're looking at Philly, VA Beach, North Carolina, Boston, and central VA here.  So when we do get together, we live it up.

It's always scary making big life decisions and choosing a college was one of those scary ones for me.  Every time I get together with these girls, I realize just how RIGHT I was in my decision to attend Juniata College.  This is proof that I was exactly where I was meant to be.

Linked up with Shanna and The Pleated Poppy

Lessons from my Mother

I've learned so many valuable lessons from my mother...

~to laugh with my mouth wide open allowing snorts to escape~never to litter and to pick up litter when possible~to work hard and diligently at everything I do~the value of a good pair of shoes~to prep food ahead of time so that meals are easier throughout the week~that classic and simple equates elegance~

to write thank you notes~the importance of making time for friends~to try new things~to dig deep for the thrifted gems~to scream and run from rodents~to find a man to take care of those rodents~that its okay to be emotional~tears don't mean weakness~less is more~makeup should be used to accentuate beauty not cover it up~modest is hottest~the way we treat others speaks volumes about ourselves~everyone needs someone to love them~patience~unconditional love~forgiveness~how to hold my head up and smile when things are hard~to kill people with kindness~to take the high road~

not to change something if it doesn't need it~to appreciate my hair just the way it is~to be silly and make time to laugh~the importance of a good night's rest~the beauty in a Disney movie~the value of spending time with loved ones~how to care for another human being~to get dirty and allow messes to happen~to bake cookies~to make up games~to build snow angels~to finish what you start

I'm so blessed to have the mom I have.  On Mother's Day I found myself sad that I couldn't spend the day with her and then I realized how lucky I am that I could talk to her.  I can talk to my mom every single day, hear her voice, and lean on her for support.  I'm so lucky to have an amazing mom and an even more amazing best friend.

I love you, mom!

Perspective.

It's interesting to me how a few things happen in our lives and we assume that its the worst weekend ever or that we have somehow, mistakingly upset the Heavens and we're being punished. #Guilty.

Then, something happens and it puts everything else into perspective.

Last Monday my husband's bank was robbed.  Luckily, the man was unarmed and no one was hurt.  But, as I sat in my classroom trying to figure out when and how I could get my car fixed so that I wouldn't go without it all week, it hit me that my car is pretty insignificant in the grand scheme of things.  The things that my husband and I argue about sometimes - they aren't really that important.  It's times like these God jerks a knot in your tail and makes you see the bigger picture.

My dad always says, "Marriage is the hardest job you will ever love."

Honestly, prior to getting married I thought he was teasing my mom when he would say that.  See, they have an incredible marriage.  I'm sure its not picture-perfect, but they were good enough parents never to let my brother or me see those imperfections.  They respect each other enough to communicate behind closed doors and without raising voices.  

I have to say, I totally agree with them.  After a frustrating weekend of things that seemed really significant at the time, Monday opened my eyes.  We had a rough weekend complete with dog bites and a fender bender in our own driveway, but none of that mattered as long as my husband was okay.  The little things were quickly forgotten.  

My husband and I have been married for almost three years.  Some would say we're in the honeymoon stage and some would say that has just ended.  Over those three years, our marriage and relationship has changed and evolved.  As I think it should do...  You learn a lot about a person in three years of living together and loving one another.

Sometimes love is hard and sometimes it is easy.

Sometimes love is messy.

I think the important thing to remember is that it is always worth it.  So, even when we have a rough weekend or we have an argument (let's be real here...no marriage is as perfect in real life as it is in Blog World or on Pinterest), its important to remember that those moments are propelling us into the next big advancement in our relationships.  

It's not the moment itself, but how we handle that moment that defines our love for one another.

Love and marriage are never going to be like the movies.  For one, its not scripted.  And two, you can only watch a movie so many times before you grow bored with it.  Thank God for that.

Chicken Chick

Part of Something Bigger

I'm a runner.

I still remember the first half-marathon I ran.  I was so nervous.  I was worried people would look at me and question my abilities.  I was scared I wouldn't finish or I would finish dead last.  It was foreign to me - this running long distances with others thing.  It was out of my comfort zone.

My husband walked me up to the corral and kissed me goodbye.  I reminded him to take pictures.  I asked him to follow me along the route.  I was worried that if I didn't see him I would lose motivation.

After he left and I was standing there all alone, I realized I wasn't alone at all.  In fact, I couldn't have been more surrounded by people just like me.

Standing in that corral I had an emotional, spiritual experience.  Looking around me I saw all these other people dressed in their running attire, all with the same goal in mind.  All with the same desire in their hearts, drive in their souls.  It was amazing to realize that I was part of something so much bigger, so much more grand than anything I had ever been part of before.  Much bigger than anything I had realized I was signing up for.  All these people running for loved ones, for charities, for sport.  In that moment, I realized what a community running is.  

This community, albeit a little crazy, is full of the most gracious, sensitive, hard working, considerate, loyal, diligent, strong, supportive, and uplifting people I have ever met.  That's why when I see the news right now I focus on the people running to help those in need after the explosions.  The people holding each other and carrying one another out of the wreckage are the people I choose to pay homage to.  Running is a community.

I'm praying for the victims of the Boston Marathon explosions, the families, the spectators, the emergency responders, and the people who did this.  I have faith that justice will prevail.

Teammates

I think one of the best parts of marriage is the fact that you have a teammate;

someone who is on your side through thick and thin, good and bad, sickness and health.

Recently, I've been feeling this season of change rolling into my life and I've shared with you all how change gives me anxiety and I'm not its biggest fan.  It brings me so much peace and comfort knowing that no matter what my hubby is in my corner rooting for me.

I was really blessed to be raised by an amazing set of parents who exhibited teamwork very well throughout their marriage.  I realized after becoming a teacher that not everyone is blessed with extraordinary parents like I am.

Being teammates doesn't mean that my hubby always agrees with me or that we do whatever the other person wants to appease them.  In fact, some times being a teammate means my hubby is the voice of reason when I get overly excited and can't think straight.  Sometimes it means I'm the one saying, we can't afford that or let's shop around.  We balance each other.

I think back to what it was like actually being a member of a team in college and how we spent all of our time together.  We were our own little family on campus.  We cheered each other on and picked each other up when we were down.  We gave each other reason to smile when things weren't going well and we cried together when we couldn't find a way to smile.  That's what marriage is about, too.  There are days that I don't have a reason to smile except to know that my hubby is going to come home and he is going to love me unconditionally no matter how my day has gone.

I love knowing that no matter what anyone else has to say, my husband is going to be there for me.  He celebrates my accomplishments with me.  He supports my passions.  He makes me a priority and, in turn, makes me feel special.

I pray that I do the same for him.  So much of our marriage is not just the team that we have become, but the team that we have in our relationship with God.  Marriage truly is a covenant between husband, wife, and heavenly Father.  Through prayer, love, and communication, our team is unstoppable.

Source: bitsotruth.blogspot.com via Yvonne, girl in the laundromat on Pinterest

Mustard Shower

I love love.
Don't you?!

Wedding season has hit big time around here.
My hubby and I have 5 weddings in the months of October and November!
I'm using about 4 dresses to wear to each of them (as well as the rehearsals) styled different ways
to avoid having to purchase multiple dresses.

Recently, I was able to help shower a friend before her wedding by co-hosting her shower.

The weather has been so goofy so I wasn't really sure what to wear to this shower because it is fall and I'm in the mood for fall, but the temperatures were in the 80s that day.

I also knew that the shower wasn't very dressy so I wasn't sure what to do.

I decided to go with polka dots - can't go wrong with polka dots - 

and a mustard cardigan.

Seriously, I've been living in this mustard cardigan since I bought it!

Who would have thought it would be so versatile?!

Cardigan: Gap, Tank: JC Penney, Skirt: Thrift, Necklace: BR

The matron of honor, bride to be, and me!

Looking forward to the big day.

Feel Good Kinda People

You know those people in your life that always make you feel good?  They say the right things, do the right things, and lift you up.  They notice your efforts and let you know that they notice.

I want to be one of those people.

Blazer: Kohl's (Lauren Conrad), Blouse: H&M, Pants: Gap Outlet (old), Shoes: Belk, Watch: Silpada

I mention those people because they really do make your heart smile throughout the day.  And sometimes, let's face it, our heart needs a good smile.

When I wore this outfit to work the other day, the secretary said, "You look so pretty."
It was a small thing, but it really made my heart smile. 

"I just like to smile, smiling's my favorite."

Elf

Humility

We had a fantastic sermon Sunday at Freedom Family Church and I feel led to share some of the notes I took away since I've been talking about true beauty on here lately.

The bible states that the "basics" God asks of us are:

1. That we seek justice (treat others with fairness and equality)
2. That we love mercy (choosing to NOT give people what they deserve sometimes)
3. That we walk HUMBLY with our God

The whole humbly thing stepped on my toes a little bit especially when I got to thinking about pride.

See humility means to think of yourself less.  It's not saying to think less of yourself.

Think of yourself less.

And that's when it hit me...

If you look in the mirror and the first thing you see is your flaws, you are too prideful to see past them.  When you look in the mirror, you shouldn't be able to immediately point out all the things you hate about yourself.  Get over yourself.  Don't put yourself down - that is not humility.

I have a tendency of picking myself apart in my photos on this blog.  Ones I share and ones that I end up deciding not to share for whatever reason.  I see all the small "flaws" or "imperfections" that other people can't see.  In fact, some of the things I think are flaws, other people love.

Some people think that humility is thinking less of yourself.  So we constantly tell ourselves that we aren't good enough, we aren't pretty enough, and we are failures.  That is not humility.  The devil puts us down enough - we need to stop doing it to ourselves!  We need to stop adding fuel to the fire.

At first, I would do this.  I would constantly try to do things to make up for all the ways I fail God every day and finally I realized I can't make up for it.  No matter what I do, I don't deserve this life or eternal life, but by His grace, I have received it.  For that I am grateful.

Putting yourself down is not pleasing to God.  In fact, it is just as dis-pleasing as constantly bragging on yourself and boasting about how great you are.  We need to, instead, be happy with the body He provided us, treat it like the temple that it is, and humbly use it in whatever way best serves Him.

Humility doesn't mean I make myself a doormat and allow other people to walk all over me.  For a while I let that happen until I realized humility doesn't mean that I should feel worthless or lesser than another person.  No one deserves to be abused, but it does mean that I put others first when they deserve it.

"But he gives us even more grace to stand up against such evil desires.  As the Scriptures say, 'God opposes the proud but favors the humble.'" James 4:6

Scarf: me, Tank: Old Navy, Skirt: me, Watch: Silpada

So when I look at this picture I refuse to look at my flaws and what I dislike about it.

Instead, I will embrace (with humility) the wonderful way in which the Lord made me.

I encourage you to stop picking yourself apart, stop looking in the mirror and comparing yourself to others.  Just stop it.  It doesn't make you feel good and it is not healthy.

Instead, be joyful in who you are and what you have.

A Perfect Day Off

Yesterday was the perfect day off...

I started off the morning with a hot cup o' joe with my hubby (There is nothing quite like a cup of coffee in the morning while watching the news.  Can I get an Amen?)

I had a doctor's appointment at 9:15 in Sanford, my old stomping grounds.  I must say, I keep all of my doctors in Sanford still because it gives me an excuse to visit every now and then.  I have to admit, I miss Sanford.  It's strange to some people to hear me say that because Sanford is nothing spectacular, but I genuinely miss the convenience, social life, and community.

 As I was driving to Sanford, I couldn't help but stare at my left hand and feel so blessed.

Do you ever have moments where you just can't believe that this is your life?

After my appointment, I went to Walmart and purchased a boo-coo (love that expression) of flowers to plant at our house.  I love this time of year simply for the harvest that is about to take place.  This year in particular I am super excited because we have also started a veggie garden on our back porch using 5 gallon buckets.

In it, we have tomatoes, cucumbers, green peppers, squash, zucchini, and okra.

I can't wait to harvest!

Perhaps the best part of my afternoon was lunch with my good friend, Laura.  I do not see Laura often enough and miss her terribly.  We are such busy women and can't always find make time to get together.  We ate at Miss Lacy's tea house and chatted for two hours!  It was bliss.

Once I got home I completed my (extremely belated) birthday present for my father.  I almost posted a picture until I realized he hasn't opened it yet and will see it if I do that!  So pictures on that (and perhaps my first tutorial??) later.

Then, my dear husband came home and took me out to sushi and The Hunger Games!

He had not seen the movie yet and we both enjoyed it.

On the way out of the movie theater, I saw the sweetest old couple holding hands.  I love it!